My family rules. Not only have we gotten to the point where we don’t even get presents for each other, but it’s the law. I love it. I don’t have my mom desperately trying to find weird out of print records for me. My sisters don’t scrounge on Amazon for books. The wife got a puppy and an expensive sofa for Christmas this year, so there’s a bit of pressure off my back….
Asshole Santa
And once a year I don a Santa costume that’s doused in cheap booze and cologne, chew a ceegar and go by the name "Asshole Santa". I’m doing it on Saturday December 16 at Criminal Records in Atlanta. Come on down and get a holiday card worth putting on your worthless photo page on myspace, you trendy follower of irony.
And on that note, below is my favorite Christmas song ever. Thanks to my long, lost friend Teasley for this. Ho! Ho! Huh?
The second mp3 was donated by Billy at Shake It and it’s an undeniably horrifying track from the mid-60’s.
Holy cow! I don’t know how I did it, but I snagged 20 of this single to sell on the Chunklet site. Just to appeal to you record nerds, there’s only 300 of this and they come in lovely letterpressed sleeves. The Harvey Milk song is one of their earliest tracks called "Hell Toupee" and the Hayride tune is "In Bottles".
Hell effin’ yes!
Ah, I’m sure I’ll sound like a broken record, but get this now before you’re cruising eBay trying to find a copy for under $20.
So I’ve been culling together my "Best of 2006" lists for the three or four people that ask every year. Quick to come to my head are Major Stars Synoptikon, MastodonBlood Mountain and Harvey MilkSpecial Wishes. There’s a slew more, but holy cow, the early part of 2007 is already stacking up nicely.
Straight from Mr. Pharmacist himself
Again, off the top of my head, The Fatal Flying Guiloteens, Shellac and Les Savy Fav have records coming out around SXSW. I’ve been lucky enough to hear the new records by The Shins (it totally kills) and Big Business (a Hydrahead masterpiece if there ever was one), and then low and behold, I go to see the Ted Leo/Death Cab extravaganza and Mr. Leo throws his new record in my mitts. Recorded by Brendan Canty (who knocked out another impressive record with The Thermals The Body The Blood The Machine this year) it’s a pretty ballsy record, but that’s what we’ve come to expect from Mr. Leo. And I’m hoping my ears aren’t playing tricks with me, but I could’ve sworn I heard a Crass cover about half way thru the album. Crass? Jesus, nice one, Ted. That makes me feel less than totally old. [Upon discussing this with Mr. Leo, I was totally wrong…..keeping this though to make me look bad.] But while I’m on the subject of things that make me feel old, why do I think of Jeff Clayton from the AntiSeen when I see Ted Leo’s bloody forehead after his show?
Until the holidays are over, shipping to anywhere in the world is free. So come on, please buy some of the goods we have in our store for yourself or a friend. It’ll make us happy.
So I just finished driving from northern Louisiana and back over Thanskgiving. Sure, there was turkey, but there was also crawfish etoufee, gumbo, caramel brownies, spinach madeline, squash souflee…..it appeared to be a ceaseless stream of food coming from my in-law’s kitchen. And I forgot to mention that it was also my birthday for which my mother-in-law cooked a stellar cake with raspberry icing and white chocolate cream icing. I promise I won’t eat for the next week, but jesus, a man can’t have any self control around that. Trust me.
So on the 16-hour road trip, we resorted to playing an alphabet game called "My mother went to the record store….." which the folks at 5minutestolive.com taught us. Basically you just go in alphabetical order and list bands that go in alphabetical order. And to make things difficult, you have to go back and recount all of the bands that were already listed. Starting with "A" is easy, and finishing around "Z" wasn’t much more challenging, so we decided to add 2 more rounds to the game. In case you’re wondering, we finished around Six Flags as we were coming in to Atlanta. I am so glad we’re done. I swear it was driving me insane to rattle all of this off, but it did help pass the time on the drive. Let’s see if we can remember this all for the drive to Pennsylvania over Christmas…..
So it began…..ABBA, Built To Spill, Calexico, Dave Matthews Band, Everclear, Frank Black, Gang Green, Helmet, Indigo Girls, The Jesus Lizard, KMFDM, Luscious Jackson, Mighty Lemon Drops, Neutral Milk Hotel, Olivia Newton John, Pussy Galore, Quintron, Raconteurs, SS Decontrol, Tim Buckley, Unrest, Victoria Williams, Ween, X, Yaz, The Zombies….
Which led to….. And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead, BBQ Killers, Circulatory System, The dB’s, Elton John, The Fleshtones, The Germs, Harry Pussy, Imogen Heap, The Jam, Kylie Minogue, L7, Mission of Burma, The Neats, The Olivia Tremor Control, Pylon, Quarterflash, R.E.M., Silverchair, The Tragically Hip, Unwound, Venom, Wilco, Xymox, Young Jeezy, Zipgun….
Which ended with….. Animals, Bread, Cracker, DMZ, ELO, Five for Fighting, Goo Goo Dolls, Harvey Milk, India Arie, Justin Timberlake, Kraftwerk, Laughing Hyenas, Moreland Audio, New Pornographers, Oblivians, The Postal Service, Queen, Red Elvises, Sigue Sigue Sputnik, Tommy Tutone, Uncle Cracker, Velocity Girl, When People Were Shorter And Lived Near Water, XBXRX, Yes, The Zippers.
I guess the real game is figuring out which bands I mentioned and which can be attributed to my wife. Seems obvious to me.
I should also add that I’ve played this game with my buddy Pete Wilkins when we were driving back from Birmingham one dark night and we ramped it up a bit by including album titles with the band which really challenged us. But then again, we’re record geeks….we yearn for the challenge. Any other games we should try?
I’ve been happy to make concessions to my wife since she quit smoking. A nice pair of shoes, a fancy sofa (which benefits me more than her) and now this little puppy that is ten pounds of cute in a five pound bag.
Sarah and Bun E.
There were four names in the running: 1. Lando, 2. Tackleberry, 3. Thor and 4. Bun E. Carlos. Obviously by the headline, you can tell which name won out. However, I have allowed myself to call him Lando on holidays….. It’s a small price to pay for not smoking. And honestly? I consider it a small concession to make.
Now is a very magical time in Atlanta. That is, when I’m around to enjoy it. There was a time when I first moved here at all the bands from Athens were stars and Atlanta had jack shit. That is, Atlanta never had bands that were cool. Sure, there’s been countless shit-splat bands that get all over the radio, but who gives a shit about that?
photo courtesy of Carbonas’ myspace page
Legends are started by bands that have record collectors in a fuss. And at the new Lenny’s, two of those bands ended a night of Atlanta’s best and brightest. I guess I sometimes go under the assumption that those not from Georgia are a bit more tapped into what’s going on here than the people that actually live here. Case in point.
photo courtesy of DryInk Magazine
The Carbonas and The Black Lips are both perched on the crest of greatness. And who can blame them? Seeing these bands for the umpteenth time never gets old, but it certainly is a bit odd to see how the crowds seem to be changing. Or rather, how there’s actually crowds to appreciate them. I guess you can call that "change". The Black Lips have been touring relentlessly through the last few years, but it wasn’t until they toured with King Khan that I think they switched from slop rock to truly fucked up savants on a mission from God. I’m still of the believe that the "O, Katrina" single might be one of the best records released in the new millenium. Then again, I only buy a couple hundred seven inches per year….what do I know?
And the Carbonas? Well, it’s singles like this, and this, and this along with an absolutely stellar recent full length on Raw Deluxe have kept my record player from collecting dust. On this recording, check out their version of "September Girls" by Big Star and the lovely in between song chatter. These boys are nothing if not total fuck-ups…..and I love them for it.
Am I crazy or is Atlanta in a total rock’n’roll renaissance right now?
There’s a slew of other bands to fuss over from here (The Frantic, Beat Beat Beat, Deerhunter, The Selmanaires, etc.), and I’ll try to get to them all in due time, but for now, please bear with me. This’ll have to do for now. Turn it up, and love the crudeness of it all.
Carbonas – Atlanta ’06
Black Lips – Atlanta ’06
“We’re all in this together. Except you. You’re a dick.”
