I’ve been told this is curated by his wife. Strongly recommended.

A good friend, Ted Hafer, committed suicide today. I’m a bit in shock. Coming back from tour, opening email and finding 4 different people notifying me that Ted, 42, the co-owner of The Grit, jumped off the parking deck at the corner of Washington and College.

When I moved to Athens in 1990, Porn Orchard were the big "cool" band in town. Everybody in the band was always a pleasure to run into, but Ted was particularly…..odd. Maybe a world-class prankster, even. It wouldn’t be uncommon to run into Ted at the 40 Watt where he was wearing a costume, fake teeth and a wig. No, this wasn’t a rare happening. To me, Ted was part of the old school "townie" guard in town and I always looked up to him.

Ted was always friendly and hospitable when I’d be sitting alone at the Grit on a Tuesday afternoon. He was in a myriad of different goofball bands during the 90’s: Rehash, The Germans, Canadian Invasion. Hell, he even contributed video footage to the Harvey Milk DVD "Anthem" which I released last year.

All in all, Ted was a real upstanding kinda guy.

Porn Orchard (l-r) Curtis, Sam and Ted

All I know is that Ted must’ve been in a lot of pain to jump off the parking deck downtown. He is survived by his charming wife, Jessica, his two lovely children and the world famous Grit on Prince Avenue.

Porn Orchard. Ted at far right.

Ted, you will be sorely missed.

Ted Hafer in disguise at the 40 Watt… thanks, Ben.

I’m in York, Pennsylvania tonite. Driving back to Boston to get back home in Atlanta.

This Rolling Stone trivia test stumped me big time. Hopefully it’ll make you look at your album covers and listen to lyrics a bit more closely.

How do you follow up a great (yet rowdy) show in Louisville? A final show in Bloomington that’s equally as rowdy. A sold out crowd at this lovely pre-Depression theater called the Buskirk-Chumley and we end up with probably the best backstage hospitality of the entire tour.

Patton starts off with two completely insane crowd members, one on the floor and one in the balcony, that completely derail the early part of the show. Much like the Louisville show (which I forgot to mention, I had to physically escort a rowdy heckler off the venue property) I had the ushers personally warn both guys that they’d be walked out if they spoke up again. I actually got a text from Brian during Patton’s opening set saying "get them out now" which I obliged only because that Louisville heckler completely ruined Brian’s set the night before.

The Buskirk-Chumley

So with asshole duties out of the way, I quickly noticed somebody filming and told them to stop which they happily obliged. Even deleted their camera.

However, there was a photographer with this enormous National Geographic-style lens on the other side of the stage which was both annoying and terribly self-important. Now, as a rule, the CoC don’t allow photographs. That’s just our policy. When I asked this guy for press credentials (a simple business card would’ve sufficed), he had nothing. So, being the "asshole" tour manager that I am, I asked him to leave. He huffed and then attempted to make a scene in the lobby as the staff looked on. He waved his "student newspaper" affiliation around like he had a 18-inch long dick. I didn’t care. No credentials. No permission. No photos. It’s that simple. After he left for the second time (yes, he was THAT self-important) I was told that his last name was "Prick". Not kidding.

You think touring is glamorous? Do THIS for two weeks.

We decided not to do a meet-and-greet after the show because we didn’t have anything to sell, but instead I got one of the Magnolia Electric kids to sell CDs for me for 15 minutes. Very nice.

After the show, I drove Doug, Patton and Brian to Indianapolis where they had rooms near the airport. I got a few hours of driving in before I started nodding off.

So the tour’s over, but it’s not over for me. I am currently in a hotel room in eastern Indiana getting ready to drive to my mom’s house in south central Pennsylvania tonite. It was fun, but I’m not out of the forest yet. Wish me luck on this long drive back to Boston.

Another few days have passed and I think I’m burned out. Long drives. No breaks. Then again, I guess as tour manager, that’s my job.

Brian smiling backstage at the Grog Shop, Cleveland

Cleveland was a great way of washing out the taste of Buffalo. Tiny room. Benson complaining. Brian and Patton talking about "the cleve". The staff were the most "rock" of this whole tour. Very road hard. Very nice.

Another long drive. This time to Louisville. I counted three times that Doug said that I was "a nobody". I guess comedians treat non-comedians as second class citizens, but his passive aggressive shit is getting on my nerves. I’ll be glad to watch him leave. Let the missing begin.

Then again, this was Brian, Patton and Doug in Louisville. I braved through 3 hail storms, two long ass traffic jams and still kept it together. An absolutely fantastic show with probably the best single malt of the entire tour. I’ll be sure to take that back with me to Georgia for friends.

The crowd in Louisville was very peculiar. Very drunk. Very…..Louisville.

Comedians of Comedy are looking for a sponsor, Glenlivet

After the show, we went to Cafe 360 and had all of them talk around me. Maybe I’m just ready to end the tour, but man, I’m  accustomed to being treated like a human being and not like…..I don’t know. A servant? The hired help? After eight tours, you’d think I could do better.

‘Roided out egos. Go figure.

Tour’s been great, but to be honest, I’m tired and ready to go home.

Then again, after Bloomington tonite, I have to start driving the van back to Boston. Yes, Boston. That’ll take 24 hours of straight driving. My flight to Atlanta leaves Friday morning. Yay.

Things have really been going nuts since the last update. Chicago was an absolute blast, but was just a ridiculous amount of work. Our hotel concierge was a huge fan and gave us the "extreme hookup" with really killer rooms in exchange for him plus one at the Vic. Fortunately, our hotel was right around the corner and Brian and I scored some killer Thai food right next door before I left for the show. The Vic itself was a great theater, but almost sprawling by comparison to other rooms we’ve done.

Doug Benson is doing this last string of dates and he showed up, along with Patton who had to fly to LA to do some press for the Ratatoille DVD. I don’t know how Patton’s holding it all together. Has to be stressful. Anyway, I got Chunx to come and take press pix before the meet and greet and then packing everything up and settling. Susanne from Flower and Joan from Riot Act along with Patton and myself had a late night meeting at the diner across the street from our hotel and then I immediately crashed.

Patton with a bacon chocolate bar at Zingermans

We left early for Ann Arbor so we could have fun milling about town. Zingermans was the biggest priority. If you’ve never been, it’s unquestionably the best deli I think I’ve ever been to. And yes, I’m including the ones in Manhattan, wise guy. Brian and Patton were immediately recognized and it led to us getting multiple samples delivered to our table. That never gets old. Afterwards, we went to a couple record stores, book stores and made a few calls, and then went to the Blind Pig.

Eugene with a ginger chocolate bar at Zingermans

As far as clubs on this tour, the Blind Pig is certainly got a legacy, but certainly doesn’t have a green room to which we’ve become accustomed. Patton had to sit on the floor and Brian was pretty pissed off about no couches to sit on. However, with that, the show itself was an enormous blast. Patton’s been working on a bit about hollywoodiscalling.com which I inspired. That’s pretty sweet.

Our trip to Amherst took seven hours and marked our turn from going to Cracker Barrel and instead going to Bob Evans. However, we had an absolutely shrill waitress who almost led Brian to killing her. He didn’t even finish his meal he was that pissed off.

The show at University at Buffalo was the inverse to Ann Arbor. A killer backstage, but absolutely zero interaction with the crowd. The show went off without a hitch, didn’t do a signing and immediately got back to our hotel.

This morning I spent wandering around Buffalo looking for ANY sort of record store or indie coffee shops, but came up empty handed. Had to make a quick dash to another hotel to get CD’s that were sent for Posehn. As it signaled the end of their part of the tour, Eugene and Maria shipped off to the airport. The last few shows will be me, Patton, Brian and Doug. We’re off to Cleveland.

Fun.

….and Patton sitting on the floor backstage at the Blind Pig, Ann Arbor

Everybody’s favorite handicapped pornographer turns 65 today!
Ya see, Larry is a hometown guy. He started his sleezoid empire
right here in my backyard of Cincinnati, OH. But what pray tell
connects Larry Flynt & a Chunklet post? Well, back in 1978 Larry
and his lawyer almost got whacked outside a courthouse in Georgia.

A white supremacist good old boy wanted to snuff out Larry due to Hustler printing some hot interracial action. A racist gets miffed at a pornographer. Write your own joke there. But what all this sorted business brought us was one hell of a punk rock classic. “Reborn” is a tune that was written and brought to life by Louisiana band The Shit Dogs back in 1980. It is one of those KBD treasures no one owns but everyone wants. It is a gritty lo-fi rawker of a time gone by.

Brings a tear to the eye, no?

Then in 1991 the COMPLETLY AWESOME & CRIMINALLY  OVERLOOKED Lazy Cowgirls laid down a full boil blow out version on their Aussie only 12” “Third Time’s The Charm” E.P. So here’s to you Larry Flynt! A great punk rock song about almost getting your ticket punched in some podunk burg in GA.

Shot down, shot down, Larry Flynt’s been shot down,
By an unknown assailant in a small Georgia town.  

The rest of the lyrics are yours to discover. It’s pure poetry.

Got a spare $600 lyin’ around? It’s all yours.

The LC’s -This is what a rock n’ roll band looks like, trust me.

Shit Dogs – Reborn 1980

Lazy Cowgirls – Reborn – 1991

Pittsburgh was last night and was a hoot. Another show at Mr. Smalls. Lightly attended (it marked Patton’s second time missing a COC gig), but still a great crowd and it wasn’t raining this time. My old Atlanta buddy Tim showed up and I fed him a big cup of 12 year old scotch as the show went on. After the show, I dragged the comedians to the old neighborhood I lived in and we went to the Original which is right across from the Quad at the University of Pittsburgh. They all cursed me the entire drive home claiming that the food’s "ick factor" would stick with them for the rest of the tour. Oopsie! Maybe I just remember it being good when I was 21. Got back to the hotel, the William Penn Hotel, which was particularly swank and immediately crashed out.

On our van at Shake It

The drive to Cincinnati was uneventful. We all went to Bob Evans for the first time. Compared to Cracker Barrel, it was pretty damned good. I think we’ll be going there again. And yes, even though it was our only day off, we still managed to squeeze in some Comedians of Comedy action for good measure at the always incredible Shake It Records in Cincinnati.

Billy called when we were 10 minutes out to tell us to park in the back. When we arrived, I could see why. The place was slammed with people there for autographs, although some boneheads thought Brian and Maria would be doing stand up for some odd reason.

My usual gauge for going to Shake It is how often I say "Wow!" while I’m there. This time? I think I stopped counting at 6. Scored a bunch of great vinyl, a handful of CDs for the van and a killer Iron Maiden back patch for Brian P.

A present I snagged for Brian at Shake It Records

Our awesome host Billy took us for food across the street afterwards and then we had to immediately duck back to the hotel so Brian could finish this screenplay he’s been working on before midnight due to a writer’s strike that starts at midnight. I tried to convince everybody to go see a movie at 8pm, but came up with no takers. Lame.

So now I’m back at the hotel (which Brian’s convinced is haunted courtesy of Patton’s "choice" in hotel….ha!) doing laundry and watching Ken Burns’ "The War". Party hard.

Chicago is tomorrow after a five hour trip. We’re at the half way point.

When I think of all the time I’ve spent on South Street in Philadelphia over the years, my mind just boggles. I remember seeing Nirvana at JC Dobb’s right on the same block, buying my weight in records at the Philly Record Exchange and a regretful amount of hair dye at Zipperhead in the late 80’s. Ugh. I’m old.

Brian and I ducked into Ishkabibbles before I loaded in. That was my first time there, I have always been a Jim’s kinda guy.

Anyway, the show tonite was a particular treat for all of us as Philly Boy Roy made a guest appearance. I almost don’t want to ruin it as it was so incredible, but I should warn you that I have video footage that I’ve been trying to upload to youtube for everybody to see. It might have to wait until I get back from tour.

The show was a lot of fun. I also got a chance to hang out with Jason K and Joseph Siwinski who just further reaffirm that all of my friends are drummers. Why is that?

PBR in the flesh!

I also got a chance to visit with people at the company that are publishing The Rock Bible next year. Very great people.

Having Sarah around was great as well, but she had to leave to go do "grown up" work back in Atlanta.

A terribly average glimpse backstage

I’ll also tack DC on here just because like Philly, it’s always a blast, but there’s really nothing that particularly special to mention. I just get annoyingly star struck around the club’s owner (Dante was in Ignition, Iron Cross and even Grey Matter) and talk about seeing him perform as a tyke in Philly back in the late 80’s. The food at the club is astonishingly fresh and healthy. A pleasant change of pace.

Oh! I also decided to purchase a GPS device so I don’t get lost on the rest of the tour. Such a smart idea!

I got it bad, got it bad, got it bad….I’m Arthur Treacher….

New York is as New York does.

I should start off by telling you that I found out that my wife passed the bar and was joining me in New York and Philly for the tour for a bit of well-deserved celebration. She was out shopping while we did two shows at Irving Plaza.

Our Irving Plaza shows are always fun. In fact, I’d almost go so far as saying they’re always the craziest of all the tours. I mean, I know that LA is their home town, but seeing them with New York comedians is always a hell of a lot more fun for me.

Jon Glazer with a pic of him on a jet ski

Special guests of note were John Mulaney, Aziz Ansari, Heather Lawless, Jon Benjamin, David Cross (introduced as Dave C. Ross) along with the usual cast of characters. Jon Glazer’s bit was excruciatingly hysterical, painfully awkward and kinda stole the show (at least as far as the guest sets went). Maria had to deal with a particularly nasty heckler and (of course) Patton proceeded to bury him when he came out after her.

Patton was particularly excited that two of the cast members from The Wire were there, but I’ve still yet to make it past the first season on DVD, so I guess I’ll have to wait to find out what I was missing. Rachel Dratch and Scott Adsit were two other highlights along with a hilarious guest list request from two windbags from the Martha Stewart Show. Hilarious.

I seemed to order a lot of pizzas that got immediately devoured upon arrival and the night just flew by. The next morning we left for Philly to do our third visit to the TLA on South Street.

These guys were moving to LA and ran into us on the Jersey Turnpike….