Yes, that’s John Brannon singing a Negative Approach song with Fucked Up. I also blew it and didn’t see Keith Morris reprise his role with Eff’d Up on the pedestrian bridge, but either my tooters were done worn out or I was too gacked out with the Vice crew at some shithole bar off Red River. Anybody remember for me? Anyone?

I’m sure you don’t need to hear it from me, but please take care of your teeth. Why do I say that? Well, I just sank eight grand into mine after twelve years of not going to the dentist. The bad news is that it costs so much, but the good news is that I’m squared away and will be going routinely now.

I wouldn’t normally bring this up in the confines of this site, but flipping through my record collection made me think to myself that it was about time for me to post "Ali and His Gang Vs. Mr. Tooth Decay" which is a priceless artifact from 1976. Featuring guest appearances by Frank Sinatra, Richie Havens, Jayne Kennedy, Ossie Davis, Arther Morrison and Howard Cosell, it makes me think that all of these folks had some serious community service hours to pay off. Why do I think that? Because a full length album about tooth decay just seems a bit excessive even by mid-70’s standards.

The production of the album is, in a word, "bad". However, the badness only enhances how completely retarded (yes, it was made by and for the mentally handicapped, ladies and gentlemen) this album is. All of the children reading their lines in unison? Oh, just cringeworthy. And how does it hold up thirty years later? Oh man, not well. Not well…..

I was lucky enough to snag a pristine copy of this album at the Lakewood Flea Market about five years ago while shopping with my buddy Garth who, coicidentally, was the guy who turned me onto this album. It was the best twenty bucks I had spent for a while.

Yes, that’s the back cover with Frank, Ali and Richie Havens…..

As a post script, I should also add that I own the "sequel" album with Jimmy Carter and many of the celebs on this outting called "The Fall of Mr. Tooth Decay". Hopefully, I will one day post it as well.

Man, there’s torture tapes galore, but there’s only one Ali vs. Mr. Tooth Decay.

Enjoy. And remember to floss.

Ali & His Gang Vs. Mr. Tooth Decay – Side 1

Ali & His Gang Vs. Mr. Tooth Decay – Side 2

Sunday was nuts. Got back to the hotel in Austin at 3:30a.m., just got an hour of sleep before hopping on a plane for Atlanta and then a connecting flight to Monroe, Louisiana. Touched down and immediately went an hour west of Monroe to pick up our new puppy.

Dave? Rudy? Udo? Uh…….how about

Got home from Louisiana around 9p.m. and immediately we’re adjusting to life with a puppy (again). God, I forget how much work they are.

Still debating on names. Sarah recommended "Paul" but I’m not feelin’ it. David Lee Roth was recommended……I’m still gunnin’ for Udo Dirkschneider. Then again, I’m the kinda guy to stick to my guns no matter hare brained they are.

Anyway, a full SXSW report is forthcoming. So much to absorb.

As many of you will know, WFMU is without a doubt one of the best radio stations on the planet. We feel so strongly about it that we’re releasing an exclusive Patton Oswalt CD-EP entitled "Frankensteins And Gumdrops" which will only be available to people that donate during The Best Show on WFMU either last Tuesday or tomorrow night between 8 and 11.

artwork by The Little Friends of Printmaking

Also! Patton will be appearing on the show tomorrow night to help with the pledge drive along with Ted Leo (of his own Pharmacists fame) and Ben Gibbard (from Death Cab for Cutie/Postal Service). We couldn’t even fathom a more legendary collection of folks for Tom’s show.

Again, this CD-EP will only be available if you call in and donate during the show, so we can’t think of a better incentive to be donating to this incredible listener supported radio station.

Ah, from our bestest afro’d buddy Jason Groth comes….

The List of Things You Might Have To Say if You’re in the Band and the Other Band Sucks But They’re Really Nice Guys

1) You’ll get ’em next time.
2) I had a good time (or) I had a good time while you were playing.
3) Keep it up.
4) Nice cymbal work.
5) It sounded really balanced.
6) It sounded good out front.
7) You guys seemed really into it.

This is only the first seven of about 40 entries that we’re puttin’ in the next issue. Suggestions? Additions? Put ’em in comments, bitches.

Yet another thing we’re culling together for an illustrated piece that Walsby’s doing for the new issue.

The most obvious choice is AC/DC’s "Fly On The Wall".

Okay, discuss…..

Here’s a well traveled clip from a 1970 German "Sonny & Cher" type variety show. Want to create pure, undeniably brilliant, entertainment? This is your grocery list.

There you have it. I mean, it seems quite obvious to me, duh.

My head practically explodes just thinking about this show. Final night of SXSW. Warehouse. Beer. Oh my.

Bands: The Breeders + NOFX + Simian Mobile Disco + Islands + Kimya Dawson + Black Mountain + Yeasayer + Fucked Up + Lucero + Jay Reatard + No Age + Neon Neon + Pissed Jeans + Atlas Sound + Two Gallants + White Denim + Matt & Kim + Municipal Waste + The Night Marchers (featuring John Reis) + Howlin’ Rain + Dead to Me + Langhorne Slim + Shearwater + Gil Mantera’s Party Dream + Grand Ole Party + Darker My Love + Moonrats + Annihilation Time + The Coathangers + Abe Vigoda + Mellowdrone + Monotonix + Aloha + Selmanaires + much more…

Comedy: Janeane Garofalo + Human Giant + Brian Posehn + Todd Barry + Eugene Mirman + Paul F. Tompkins + Jon Glaser + Jon Benjamin + Earles & Jensen + Leo Allen + Hard n Phirm + Scott Aukerman + BJ Porter + Reggie Watts + Jonah Ray + Matt Brunger + more….

Saturday, March 15th @ Waterloo Park in Austin,Texas
This event is free, all ages and open to the public.
Noon ’til 10pm

Not bad for an afternoon’s work…..

I’ll have a few of the silkscreened poster for the show for sale afterwards. Shore is purty, ain’t it?

Flipping thru this last month’s Mojo, I came across this ad. Unlike the previous Danzig post, this is 100% real. Yes, that’s former Iron Maiden singer Blaze Bayley shilling for a hair replacement company.

As an ironic aside, Sam (the lead singer from Mooney Suzuki) uses spray-on hair. I wonder if this company even tried contacting him first? Hmmmm…..